Has The Coastal Grandmother Found Love Again?

My husband passed away five and a half years ago. As I have written in some of my blogs, it was a difficult time in my life. We had been married 51 years. I was in my late seventies. It was daunting to think about starting over. I had the choice of either living in the past with my memories or moving on.

I realized, after a year, that I was ready to clean out my house and move to something more manageable. I wrote about that experience in the “Meet Toni” section of my website. I also covered some of the activities I forced myself to get involved in. That blog is called, “What Does the Coastal Grandmother Do in the Winter Months”. I use the term, “forced”, because that is what it took at that time. It would have been so much easier to just drown in my loneliness!

Does Prayer Work

About a year and a half after my husband passed, I decided I really wanted a relationship in my life again. I felt I still had love to give. I decided to join a “dating” website at the suggestion of friends. That was an experience in itself! Suffice it to say, it did not work for me. I began to question if that was what God had in mind for me. My prayer changed from just asking God to send me someone I could love, to asking Him, if that was not His plan, to just remove that desire from me. I think the hardest part of my walk in faith is “letting go and letting God”. After praying that prayer, I still wanted to control the process!

About that time, Bob Shepherd, a friend of mine, wrote a book, “Delay is Not Denial”. That book gave me so much encouragement! Bob knew he wanted to be an actor from an early age, but it was not until much later in life that he actually achieved that dream. He is the “doctor” who pronounces Abraham Lincoln “dead” in Steven Spielberg’s movie “Lincoln”. He was also, “the father” in the national ad for Hearing Assist hearing aids. You can actually see him in the movie, “That Summer the Wolf Came”, which is being screened on Sunday, March 23rd at 3:00 pm, at the FFX Theater in Virginia Beach. He is busier now at eighty than many actors in their twenties!

Robert Shepherd’s book, “Delay is Not Denial “ Available on Amazon

Finally, as has happened in my life many times, I was able to just find peace in letting it all go and trusting God to provide exactly what I need at exactly the right time. My life is full and satisfying, and I am grateful for that. Then, in January, I wrote the blog, “The Coastal Grandmother Makeover 2025”. I wrote that Mike Mikovitz was the winner and went on to highlight the makeover. Naturally, through that process, Mike and I spent a lot of time together. We were already good friends from a year of playing bridge in the same group.

Mike felt he was ready to start dating, and I actually encouraged him to join a dating website. After his makeover, and posting his “after” photo, he started to get some serious responses on his profile. I have to admit I felt a little jealous! When I jokingly shared that with Mike, he told me in no uncertain terms that he was interested in being more than friends. He had just not been sure how I felt.

What Does it all Mean?

Many times, our dreams and prayers are not always answered in the way we imagine. Mike did not come in the “package” I had created in my mind; a worldly, sophisticated, breathtakingly hansome man dressed like a “Calvin Kline” model! I said, “in my imagination”, right? What I realized is that he is what I call, a “quality” person, someone with character and integrity. He is a Godly man who is honest, trustworthy, loyal to a fault and ruggedly handsome in his own way. He is attentive and fun to be with. He is well up on current and past events which leads to lively discussions. He is sensitive to where we are going and asks me how he should dress. We both have grown children, and all four are in favor of us seeing each other. They just want us to be happy.

My son has decided to move to Tennessee to be near his son and family. He feels he needs a new start, and I agree. He has not had a home in almost two years. He, and his wife, Nancy, were going to build a house on their land near Williamsburg. When she passed last November, he lost the desire to build the house. He bought a lovely ranch home in Tennesseee on five acres where he plans to raise “mini cows”! Yep, his oldest granddaughter, Talia, planted that idea as soon as she heard how much property he has. Other than his three years in the army, he has always lived close to me. Even though I will miss him terribly, I am happy for him.

My daughter said yesterday, “Mom, isn’t God good. Just when Buck moves away, He brings Mike into your life”! I think that is the point of this blog, and also, of life in general. Prayer never goes unanswered. It may not be answered in the timing we would like or even in the way we expect, but it is always answered, and it is always perfect.

To be continued ……………..